Exam. Exam. Exam. It was a continuation because this is what I meditated about this morning. I always panic about them because of how important it is not to fail. And what if I fail? There’s no more money. Money, how will I survive?
I grip my pen. Terrified. I’m always terrified now. Since he quit on me. Since he quit talking to me. Do you know what that’s like to lose an extension of yourself?
“Shake it off…” I say to myself.
“You’re not alone,” I whisper, “you have your mom, and grandma, and the dogs.” … but not him.
I used to be okay with the future, whatever would happen. Now it leaves me terrified.
This exam makes me terrified. It is so important. It will decide whether I go on, or am stuck in this town. I meditate on the fact the Goddess laid out my Choice Paths long ago. But which for me? This exam has a choice of its own. I want better. This will decide if things will be better. I just want to know she’ll be okay. We’ll be okay.
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