When I am hungry, it is hard for me to concentrate. I start to feel bored. Eating gives me something to do with my hands. It is hardly ever about savoring the food or being mindful about it. I feel bad when I am eating. I feel self-conscious and like everyone is staring at me. I feel guilty when I eat, like I am doing something wrong. When I am full I feel even more guilty. I feel like I am a pig and I am a horrible person. If I am at a party then junk food makes me feel good, but if I am alone it makes me feel bad. I feel good when I am eating healthy food because I don’t feel as guilty eating it.
I have worked on savoring my food more instead of using it as a way to keep my hands busy. I try not to watch TV while I am eating because then I don’t even remember what the food tasted like. I just look down and the food is gone. I try not to eat until I am full, since it makes me feel so bad. I also try eating healthier, since it makes me feel good.